Failing Miserably

Project me is failing miserably. I have been super stressed out lately after finding out that the company I work for is laying off another 40% of our staff, and this only 90 days after already having laid off 40% of our staff. That's about 100 people in just 3 months. Now, in light of all the layoffs occurring across the country, 100 people may not seem like a lot. but when the original work staff was about 150 people to begin with, well, then 100 people is a lot! And for those left behind, life isn't much easier. I mean, yes, we have a job - and that is a big deal. But we'll be taking a 10% paycut and will have 3 times as much work. So many of us are already so tired.
I'm among those that are tired. I have little time for anything beyond work. Not time to workout and certainly no time to cook healthy meals. And so, my "project" is a mess.

I tried to get back on track this past Saturday. Woke up early, took the dog for a run/walk. Was GREAT. I actually enjoyed running - even though I couldn't sustain much of a run, I sure did try. And was looking forwward to doing it again. Then, like an idiot, I went and started moving heavy furniture around my house and wound up pulling a muscle, or two, in my lower back. Talk about painful! Needless to say, as I am barely able to walk, working out was definitely out of the question.

I HAVE to do something about this. something has to give. Maybe I need to be hypnotized. or need therapy. or have lap band surgery. I keep trying to get the eating compulsions under control, but the harder I try, the worse I do. it's crazy!

I haven't been near a scale, but I would be willing to bet I've actually gained weight. I'm disgusted with myself, to be perfectly honest.

I need help.